Awful

Upon reading posts from the publicus of the Tricks Tutorials forum, I stumble on this horrible story.

I lost my virginity (to a fatty)
So this girl named Mindy come over to my house to bid farewell to 2 of my roommates who are moving out. Never met her before.

Over the course of about an hour I talk to her and decided she wasn't hideous, so why not try out some of the stuff I learned from "the mystery method" Negs, IOI, IOD, DHV etc.. She totally fell for it and in about 2 hours I had her watching a movie in my bed, Almost Famous.

Earlier in the night she dared me to chug a beer which I did, though I was barely buzzed I should note, I told he she owed me.

At the end of the movie shes like "So what do I owe you" I think... hmmm I've always had a shower fantasy. So I subtly said "I'm taking a shower" then I very overtly brought a condom with me.

It was all pretty good, she ended up coming in. I stripped and got in, she was outside the shower. Then she turns off the light and I'm like ".... why don't you leave it on?" She silently sneaks into the shower and we start clumsily making out.

Meanwhile I'm as limp as wet spaghetti. Fuck! it's pitch black. I try to think of some arousing things, but the clumsy making out is very distracting and not very arousing.

Then she grabs my limp noodle and I'm kind of speechless in the moment. She then silently goes down and starts sucking my limp dick, I'm not sure why, maybe I'm so used to getting hard from porn I need visual stimulus. I swear it took like 3 or 4 minutes to finally get a nice picture in my head enough to arouse me.

Then finally the flag is at full mast, and she tries to slip it in. Still pitch black mind you, I don't even know what's happening, which I later found out is because she is loose as a fucking goose....

Now I'm not going to say I'm big, but I'm above average. like 7.5-8 inches. Her fat was in the way , she tried 3 different ways and could not get any more than the tip in, which made me laugh my ass off and again with no visual I lost Mr Flagpole.

She tried to revive it, but I assured her it was the dark.

We then tried to get dressed, all I had was my pants, she had a whole ensemble which for some reason she left on top of the open toilet seat and it fell in and got soaking wet.

Also I might add that the bathroom is in the middle of the house with 6 other people in it at the time, lol

So after laughing off the trip back to my room, it is like 3:45 am. I'm pretty tired and her body definitely was not the visual I needed for arousal. Eventually I convinced her to let me put on some porn which got me hard in less than a minute.

THEN the guy who moved out a month ago from the basement comes in the room to see the soon to depart roomates, he stays and makes conversation for about 5 minutes as she and him know eachother.

He finally leaves, soft again she refuses to reset the porn video and faps and sucks my softy for another 2-3 minutes before I am able to think vividly enough about the porn we watched earlier.

Finally I slip on the condom and am a little bit anxious about what is about to happen. I get on top, missionary, her fat legs around me.

She grabs it and slips it in, and I fought so hard not to put a horribly disappointed look on my face, it was like wanking with my hand relaxed, not squeezing she was fucking looser than a fucking bucket of worms.

Nevertheless I pumped away, it slipped out like 20 times and I couldn't tell most of the time. She was groaning and shit, I tried not to look at her, her pleasure faces were not pleasurable to observe.

I don't think she actually came, but she was like "whenever you're ready" so I tried my best. No luck. I said I had to piss and went to the bathroom and finished myself off.

PS: she was like 170lbs i'd guess

Horrible way to lose one's virginity lawl